30 September, 2010

October 2010 Financial/Life Goals

Something that I've been wanting to do for a long time is get our finances in order. We aren't horrible -- not thousands and thousands of dollars in debt or anything like that, but we have some issues that we need to take care of. Really. Its not THAT bad. I promise. But we're still adjusting to the Hawaiian life style, and a couple of our bills are ridiculous and we just...well...we basically need to get our shit together. So now, I'm going to start making goals for our finances and life, and hopefully we'll stick to them. Also, I've been watching a lot of Suze Orman, and she makes me feel bad for not having money in a savings account or a retirement fund.

This month is going to be pretty easy, since its my first month.

1. Make a detailed budget and stick to it.

2. Get back to meal planning. This is going to be a little difficult this month since my parents are coming into town for 8 days and I highly doubt we'll be eating at home very often...which just makes sticking to a budget even harder.

3. Write out a chore list for everyone in the house so it gets done. (since its hard for the boob machine to do everything in the house all the time when the boob monster wants to eat all the time and hates being in her bouncy seat/swing)

4. Spend $60 or less on Halloween goodies, including costumes.

5. Make budget for Thanksgiving and Christmas, including who we are going to buy presents for, and shipping costs.

6. Lose the last little bit of the baby weight -- or at least start out small by going on walks a couple of days a week.

7. Call about life insurance that mysteriously got cut off last month, and look into talking to JAG about a will.

8. Obtain spear and spear fishing gear for Bradford.

9. Go through Roo's toys and clothes for things she can't fit into and things she doesn't play with anymore. Donate or sell.

10. Budget for savings, car fund, doula school and cloth diapers.

Ten goals. I think that these ten goals can be easily accomplished this month.

OH! I'll add one. 11. Enjoy visiting with my parents for 8 days! I'm so excited for them to get here.

So I'll update this in November with how I did with my goals for October, and go from there. This will continue to be a monthly thing, until we get our shit together. Or at least until I feel comfortable enough about our situation. Now only will I be blogging about mommy and wifely shit, but I'll be doing this now too.

Aren't you excited?!

28 September, 2010

2 week baby check up

Baby O's 2 week appointment was today (28 Sept. 2010). I can't believe my little OCHO is 2 weeks old today! She seems so much older for some reason.

So at birth she was 7lbs 15oz and 20in. At her appointment the day after we checked out of the hospital she was 7lbs 7oz and still 20in. Today, she's gained a whole pound since her first appointment after we got out of the hospital! She's weighing in at 8lbs 7oz! And she's grown half an inch and is now 20.5in! She seems like she's a ton bigger than she actually is. She's like a little beefcake. Bradford thinks differently...but whatever. She feels like a beefcake.

She's doing amazing at breastfeeding -- latching on really well and eating for a decent amount of time. Except today when she had a lazy day. But I think most of that was because she had a doctors appointment. All she wanted to do was sleep. Poor thing. I also feel overwhelmed with doctor appointments.

I need to make a phone call to see about the test results of her newborn screening...but I forgot today, so I'll probably do it tomorrow. Though I would assume that they would call if something was wrong -- the newborn screen tests for all kinds of ridiculous diseases, so if they didn't call, I would be horribly disappointed and would probably be suing someone.

Her pediatrician also wants me to schedule her for an ultrasound. Apparently, since she was breech for so long into my pregnancy (she flipped somewhere between 30 and 33 weeks or so...) she has an increased risk for hip dysplasia. But all the research I've done suggests that it happens mostly in baby girls who are born by c-section because they are breech, or are born breech vaginally. It's pretty common for babies to be breech up until the very end of pregnancy, and they don't even start to worry about it until between 35-37 weeks. I'm waiting until they get the order at the radiology department at Tripler to schedule it...and I have to wait till after she's 6 weeks old anyway, but what I'm a little irritated about is that out of everything I've read, there is generally a reason that they will send you to have an ultrasound done -- generally there is a clicking/popping feelings when the doctor moves babies legs...they never mentioned anything at the hospital. Or at her discharge appointment. Or at her 2 week appointment. It just bothers me so much that they are basing this decision on the fact that she was breech in-utero, when that's generally the norm, and there are no other factors that would lead them to believe that she needs to be checked out. It's just frustrating to me, and I don't know why....but she'll be getting an ultrasound done anyway...*sigh*

Other than that -- she's just an amazing baby. She's great at sleeping at night, and basically has a schedule already. She'll wake up on and off between like 6 and 10 at night, and she'll eat and doze, and be awake, but then somewhere between 10 and 11, she decides that she's tired for the night and she goes to sleep for 4 hours or so. Then she'll wake up to eat, then go back to sleep for another 4 hours-ish. It's so awesome. With Reilly I always felt like I was up all the time with her, and Ophelia is so easy, especially at night. She is a little diva though. She hates being naked for the most part. She hates any kind of wetness or poop in her diaper. She hates her bouncy seat...she barely tolerates her swing. She doesn't like the car too much either. She loathes binkies. I just hope that I can get her to take a bottle before my parents get here. I should probably try that sometime soon. Like I said in a previous post, I've been pumping, so I have a small supply.

I'm just going to continue crossing my fingers that she keeps being an amazing baby. With the exception that she shits A TON. Haha. Also, very excited to see Grandma and Grandpa next week, and then Nanny in about a month and a half! YAY! I've missed my parents soooo much since we moved and I can't wait to hang out with them! Of course, I'm just as excited to see my mother in law! Absolutely can't wait.

23 September, 2010


I am excited. Super excited. Why? I have successfully pumped about 10oz of breast milk. I have 5 little bags in my freezer at this time that have the very best thing for my baby in them. This is exciting for me for a couple of reasons. First, it was more than I ever pumped with Reilly. With Reilly, I was so stressed that I couldn't pump, no matter what I did. Even when I was engorged, it didn't work for me. I had an amazing pump too, so it wasn't the pump. It was me. I physically unable to pump because of how stressed I was. Second, if I keep on pumping the way I am, I won't have to supplement for any reason. I feel accomplished!

This was something that I really wanted to do. Really bad. I felt like a big time failure after I stopped breast feeding after three months with Reilly. Even 4 years later, way after I would have weaned her if I had continued to breast feed, I still feel guilty after all this time. Maybe I was too young when I had Reilly to really stick to my guns, and what I knew was the best thing for her. I guess I shouldn't feel guilty...she's a happy, healthy, well rounded 4 and a half year old. I just feel like I could have done so much better with her when she was a baby. I guess I'll have to get past it eventually...forgive myself in a sense for not doing the very best for my little lady.

But on the bright side, I feel totally ready and willing to breastfeed for at least 6 months with Ophelia. That is my goal. If I go longer, then yay, but if I get to 6 months and decide to wean, then at least I made it to my goal. I don't know what's going to happen in the next 6 months, and maybe weaning will be the best choice for us, especially since I want to get into the learning and what not. We'll see...we'll see. I'm just proud of myself for being so pro-breast feeding right now. I don't even freak out about feeding her in public, especially when she's in her wrap...its so easy. And you can tell its working...today we had to switch her out of newborn size diapers, which I believe fit babies up to 8lbs, into her cloth diapers because the disposables were too tight on her. YAY! I am so excited about that too. I'm hoping she has another growth spurt soon since the diapers go halfway up her stomach.

So that's where we're at with breastfeeding. Really, its amazing this time around. I mean, I'm a walking food machine, and sure, sometimes its a little bit of a pain in the ass -- like when we're on our way home and Ophelia wants to eat RIGHT NOW, or every 30 minutes or so for hours on end, but its worth it. She's happy. I'm happy. Reilly thinks its awesome. Brad seems happy with my choice...mostly because he gets to be pervy and look whenever I'm feeding Ophelia. It just works with our household.

And that makes me happy.

20 September, 2010

I am so in love...

I lay here in bed with my week old daughter on my chest and I just want to cry. I want to cry, not out of sadness or regret, but out of happiness and love. I am so in love with my new daughter, it is ridiculous. It's hard to put into words how happy I am right now. One of the things that I worried about with getting pregnant and having another baby was if I was going to be able to love another baby as much as I love my Reilly Roo. But I can. And I do. This little girl makes my heart swell, even when she cries. Even when I'm sleep deprived.

I feel a little bad. I feel like I failed as a new mom with Reilly after having Ophelia. I wasn't in a good place emotionally. I felt for a very long time that I didn't have the support from Reilly's dad that I needed. I had a full time job after Reilly was born, and watching her wasn't the only thing I was doing. I wasn't sleeping, and when I did, it wasn't good sleep. I was very frustrated when she was a baby. I have so much more support with Ophelia, and I feel like I can enjoy her as an infant. Brad has been such an amazing support with, not just Ophelia now, but with my whole pregnancy. He understood that I was tired a lot and that I had a hard time doing things. He was so supportive while I was in labor...he believed in me. He's been amazing since we've been home from the hospital, making dinner, doing chores, and just in general, helping out when I need it. He's supportive of my breastfeeding too, which I adore. He helps with Reilly and helps her feel not so alone, because lets face it, adding a new baby to a balanced household will turn it upside down!

We're all still getting adjusted, and it gets easier every day...not just for me, but for all of us. I'm more energetic because I had a non-medicated, all natural child birth. I WANT to do things, even though I try to take it easy. Reilly is getting better at understanding that Ophelia doesn't care about her toys or her games....yet...but that doesn't mean that she won't soon. Brad is adjusting to our sleep schedule. I have no doubt that this will be the easiest thing that we've done in a long time.

I am so in love right now. With my baby, my princess, and my husband. I feel so close to him right now. I look at Ophelia and I wonder how we got something so amazing. I look at Reilly and know how lucky we are to have such an amazing, smart, funny little lady. I can't imagine being anywhere else in my life right now. I remember being depressed with Reilly -- enough that I was put on anti-depressants. And while I'm emotional right now, I'm not sad. I'm not depressed. I'm happy. I am so happy.

I haven't blogged in awhile. I've been at a loss of things to say. I wanted to complain so much about my worries about giving birth at a military hospital with a doctor that I didn't know. I was frustrated about being in Hawaii and not liking it and wanting to move so badly. I wanted to complain about how all I wanted was a beer and a cigarette. I was a negative person for a little bit. I was stressed and sad and frustrated. It's not that I wasn't happy, but all those other things took place of any good feelings I could have had. I haven't been stressed at all lately. Even the last couple weeks of my pregnancy...even when I was ready for her to come into the world, I wasn't upset as much, or stressed, I was just ready for her to be here.

My life is perfect right now. Sure, I don't really want to be living in Hawaii. Sure, we have a couple bills that we might be stretching money over. We have stress in our every day life just like anyone else. But right now, none of that is as important as how much I am in love with my family right now. I don't need anything else. We could be living in a box tomorrow and I wouldn't care. (Okay, I would, but you get it.) My two girls are the lights of my life. They are the most amazing and gorgeous little ladies in my life. They are gonna cause trouble in a couple of years. :)

I have the most amazing husband who I love with a passion. I couldn't have asked for a better person to live my life with.

This is amazing.

Birth Story -- Welcome Baby Ophelia

On September 13th, around 3:30pm or so, I started having contractions that were between 5 and 15 minutes apart. They weren't really uncomfortable or anything...I could talk through them and be pretty active for the most part. I had spent the majority of the afternoon cleaning, so I just figured that my cleaning spree had started the contractions. I figured that they would fizzle out after a couple hours.

Things went on normally for the next couple hours. We made dinner and ate, put Reilly to bed, I took a shower, and we got into bed. I was trying to time my contractions, but they were still erratic...lasting anywhere from 30-45 seconds and coming every 2-5 minutes or so. Around 12:15 am, I decided that we should probably start getting ready to head to Justin's house to drop Reilly off to stay the night. I didn't see any need to rush, but we couldn't really diddle around for very long since we had quite the drive. We got Reilly up and loaded into the car. My contractions by this point were still pretty erratic. I wasn't at all worried, I just wanted to make sure we got to the hospital in time.

We dropped Reilly off at Justin's house around 1am or so and promptly drove to Tripler. By the time we got to Tripler and up to Labor and Delivery, it was almost 1:30am. We had to stop multiple times on the way up to the L&D floor because I was having contractions. Thankfully there was no one in the hospital walking around since it was so early in the morning. I got there and they got me into triage so that I could get checked and see what I was at. I told the OB how far apart my contractions were and everything. She didn't really seem to think that I was in labor, but I think that was mostly just me. I got into triage, only to find out that I was dilated to 5cm. It seemed like I was doing a lot more work than apparently my body thought I was. They monitored my contractions, and like I had been feeling, they were pretty erratic. The OB (the midwives didn't arrive to L&D until 6am) said that I had a couple options...I could be admitted or I could go walk around for a little bit. I didn't think I could go for a little stroll, but I didn't want to get admitted because that would mean I would have to be put on constant fetal monitoring, which I didn't want. The nurse said I could stay there for a little bit and think it over, so I stayed in triage to think it over.

By this point I was having a really hard time coping with the pain, and told Brad that I wanted an epidural and pitocin because I just wanted to get this done and over with. I was so tired and the contractions hurt so bad that I couldn't get a handle on them. Everything that I could try to use for coping wasn't working. I was getting really frustrated with myself and the pain and all I wanted to do was stop it. Right around the time I made this decision, my water broke (officially at 2:40am). The nurse came back in to verify that my water had broken and that there was no meconium in there. The OB came back in to check and see how far I was dilated. No meconium in my water (yay!) and in the hour or so since I had initially been checked, I went from 5 cm to 8 cm. I told the OB that I had decided that I wanted to get pain meds. She brought in paper work for me to sign. I kept having contractions that seemed to be getting closer together by the second. They brought me a wheelchair to get me to a delivery room, but the contractions got so bad and suddenly, I felt this really intense urge to push. And let me tell ya, it feels EXACTLY like you have to take the biggest crap you've ever had to take in your entire life. True story. I told the nurse that I felt like I had to push. She quickly checked me and after that it was such a blur. I was still in triage, and there were people rushing in left and right with birthing utensils . I didn't have the chance to get an IV (I didn't want one per my birth plan) and they barely had a chance to get the fetal monitor on my stomach. I started pushing with my instincts for the most part. They coached for a few of them but for the most part, I pushed all by myself. When she started crowning, they notice that she had meconium in her hair, so I had to give super big pushes at the end so they could get her out fast.

Ophelia Caedyn Harlowe Oberklaus was born at 2:54am on September 14, 2010. They put her directly on my chest, and cleaned her up from there. I had two small labial tears, neither required stitches. After they cleaned all of us up, they moved us all from triage to an actual labor and delivery room so they could take her vitals and I could get cleaned up more before they transferred me to the mother/baby ward. She weighed 7lbs 15.8oz and was 20" long, with a head full of red hair and blue eyes.

Aside from the normal pain that comes along with childbirth, I feel fantastic! I felt so much better this time than after having an epidural with Reilly. And as much pain as I was in, I'm really glad it happened fast enough that I didn't really have a choice in what happened. Ophelia has a little bit of bruising under her eyes and some little spots on her forehead from coming out so fast.

The whole thing was absolutely amazing. Brad was an amazing support person. He was behind me 100%, even when I felt like giving up, he had total faith in me. What surprised us the most was how fast she was born! I got talked to by many doctors and nurses about giving birth really fast, and in triage...AND NATURALLY....none of which happens very often! I was literally the talk of labor and delivery. :D

We're both doing amazing. She's doing really well at breastfeeding...and she hates sneezing. She's such an amazing little thing. I'm so glad I have two little ladies to call my own. <3<3